


accident

by reddieforlove



Series: Mileven Drabbles/Oneshots [9]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Canon Compliant, F/M, Fluff, Future Fic, Nightmares, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-10
Updated: 2018-01-10
Packaged: 2019-03-02 23:33:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13328766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reddieforlove/pseuds/reddieforlove
Summary: Eleven has nightmares about the people she's killed, and doesn't trust herself around Mike after she accidentally uses her powers on him - prompt from tumblr





	accident

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt request from tumblr.
> 
> Go to my blog (reddieforlove) if you want to request a drabble/fic of your own.

It started with a nightmare. They were chasing her through the endless halls of the lab. All the people she’d killed. Dead-eyed with cold hands that reached for her as they whispered her name.

_“Eleven.”_

_They were catching up with her._

_“Eleven.”_

_There was nothing but a wall ahead._

_“Eleven.”_

_A hand grasped her shoulder._

“El!”

She heard a loud crash and her eyes flew open, the bright light of the lab fading away as the dim cabin swam into view. El sat up when she heard a groan, panicking for just a moment until her eyes fell on him and she remembered where she was and who else was there. Mike had come over so that they could watch a movie together while Hop was working late. Now he was slumped against the wall with a hand pressed to the back of his head and his wide eyes on her. The obvious and horrifying explanation dawned on her slowly as she pressed a hand over her mouth, her eyes stinging with tears. Mike tried to scramble to his feet but she could see that he was in pain. Pain that she caused. It was her fault.

She did this to him.

With a choked sob, El pushed off the couch and ran into her room, slamming the door shut behind her as he yelled out her name. The locks clicked into place before he could open it and she collapsed against the door, burying her face in her hands. All she could see when she closed her eyes was the crowd of dead faces, all looking at her, their murderer. 

They were the bad men but she still killed them. Their blood was on her hands. Among their bloody eyes and reaching hands, she saw Mike looking at her with cold fury. Blood dripped from his head. He pointed at her, showing her exactly where the blame fell. A loud knock on the door made her flinch as a gasp slipped from her lips.

“El,” Mike said through the door. “It’s okay. I’m okay.”

He didn’t sound like he was in too much pain but all El could see was him flying across the room and hitting the wall because she wasn’t in control.

“You should leave,” she said, wiping furiously at her cheeks even though the tears wouldn’t stop falling.

“I’m not going anywhere. Just… let me in.”

El shook her head, a shudder running through her body as she wondered what she might have done if he’d been hurt worse. All she’d ever wanted to do was be closer to Mike and it got easier and easier as the years went by. But now… now all she could think was that she was the worst thing for him.

_You have a wound, Eleven, a terrible wound._

She whimpered at the words that she heard so long ago from the version of Papa that Kali made her see.

“C’mon, El,” Mike said through the door.

__And it’s festering._ _

“Go away.”

_It means a rot. And it will grow. Spread._

“Please let me in.”

“Go away!” she shouted, the books on her dresser flying into the wall as the lights flickered.

There was a few moments of stunned silence as El pulled her knees to her chest and cried as quietly as she could.

“No,” she heard Mike said on the other side of the door.

El bit down on her lower lip hard because she could see him sitting on the floor with his back to the door just like her, a stubborn set to his jaw. It just made her break a little more, knowing that he wouldn’t give up on her even now.

“I could have killed you.”

Mike didn’t answer for a long time.

“Did I ever tell you about the time my family went to Disney World?”

She didn’t say anything, stunned out of her crying for a moment by the random question. Mike went on as if she had answered.

“I don’t remember it but I’ve heard the story. I was two or three, I think, and my dad sat me on this low wall while he tried to find money so my mom could get Nancy an ice cream cone. I ended up reaching for him and fell off. Broke my arm right there.”

Her breath hitched a little as she imagined a small child with freckles and dark eyes screaming in pain. It made her stomach twist uncomfortably.

“And when I was five, Nancy and I really wanted to go sledding but my mom told us there wasn’t any snow because it was July. We were so upset that we decided to do it anyway, on our stairs. Nancy got a box lid from the basement and I wanted to go first. I got a concussion and had a black eye for a long time.”

El didn’t know how he managed to calm her down just by talking but somehow the tightness in her chest had eased up and she was listening to him.

“When we were nine, Dustin ran into me with his bike and knocked me onto a big rock. I had to get twelve stitches in my arm.”

She wiped at her eyes with her shirt sleeve, sniffling a little.

“They were all accidents, El. It wasn’t my dad’s fault or Nancy’s or Dustin’s, just like that wasn’t your fault,” Mike said.

El closed her eyes, leaning her head back against the door.

“I might do it again, Mike,” she said, her voice wavering.

 _I’m a monster_.

She had told him that so long ago but he didn’t believe her then. El had the feeling he’d be even less inclined to believe her now.

“You might not do it, though,” Mike told her. “I’m not gonna go away just because of something that  _might_ happen.”

El took a deep breath, sinking her teeth into her lower lip.

“I love you, El.”

Her eyes sprang open and she lifted her head as her heart skipped a beat. It wasn’t as if she didn’t know. It was easy to see the truth in Mike’s eyes every time he looked at her. But there was a difference in knowing something to be true and hearing it for the first time. She pushed herself to her feet slowly, turning around to look at the door as her hand lifted.

Then the locks were turning and the door was swinging open before Mike could move, his head snapping around from exactly where she knew he’d be sitting. His eyes turned up towards her and he just stared for a long few moments as her lower lip wobbled and she sniffled, knowing that she probably looked like a wreck.

“You love me?” El said, watching as he rose to his feet.

Mike nodded, his fingers nervously playing with the edge of his sweater. She took a few careful steps towards him, reaching up to press her hand over his cheek.

“I’m sorry.”

He shook his head before she even finished saying it, leaning his head into her touch.

“It’s okay,” Mike assured her.

She wasn’t sure that he was right. There was every chance that she might hurt him again. But if someone like Mike Wheeler believed in her and loved her, then maybe there wasn’t a wound festering deep in her after all. He knew her better than anyone, better than she knew herself sometimes. He’d seen her at her worst and her best and was there any real question when it came to the two of them?

“I love you too,” El whispered, knowing the answer to that question already.

He blinked with surprise before gathering her in his arms, pressing a long kiss to her lips. She relaxed into him, cupping his face in her hands gently. El still wasn’t sure about everything else but she was sure about Mike. She could only hope that the rest would come with time.

**Author's Note:**

> I would love to hear what you think!


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